Dequirp: v. To remove quirps.
Quirp: n. Quirk + Quip. Witty remarks that are difficult to understand due to their obscurity.
“The paper was 2050 words, and then I dequirped it and it ended up at 603.” “That’s a crapload of quirps!” “That it is.”
Thip: n. 1) Condensed portmanteau of “Think” and “Trip”. A stumble in ones thoughts.
Thip: v. 2) To stumble in ones thoughts.
“I was trying to figure out how the story I’m writing would end, but then I thipped and started humming the soundtrack from Paint Your Wagon.” “That’s kind of a big thip.” “Yeah, I’m impressed too.”
Carbiter: n. One who is relied on to settle decisions about automobiles.
“Wasn’t sure what van to buy, so I turned to my carbiter, Patty. Turns out they were both made of cardboard!”
Dexifer: n. One who is highly skilled at breaking things.
“Agh, I can’t get this bubble pack open!” “Give it here, I’m a dexifer.”
Lacunae: n. 1) An empty space or a missing part; a gap.
“There were sizeable lacunae in his knowledge of hippo physics.”
Lacunae:n. 2) A cavity, space, or depression, especially in a bone, containing cartilage or bone cells.
“Have you figured out why my leg hurts?” “It appears that one of the lacunae in your femur is literally filled with tootsie rolls.” “Oh, yeah. That makes sense.”
Lacunae:v. 3) A scottish phrase which translates to “lack you not.” Faded from use for a few hundred years, but regained popularity after Gentleman PPT’s hip hop song, Lacunae Me topped music charts.
“You will fight the dragon, lacunae courage.”
Haversian systems: 1) n. In ancient times, the third joke ever invented went like this, as told by the friend of a man named Haver. “Hi, I’m Throk.” “Hi, I’m Haver.” “Haver?! I barely know ‘er!” They laughed for six generations, and the cause of the laughter was forgotten. The last generation of laughing folk decided that a god must have given them this joy, and they started a religion, and became Haversians. Haversianism was a somewhat small religion, and eventually dwindled until all that were left were a few lonely Haversian computer programmers. They uploaded their consciousness into robots, and multiplied, becoming an entire fleet of Haversian systems.
“Hey, maybe we can tell a joke like “Haver?! I barely know ‘er!” or something.” “No, that would offend the Haversian systems.”
Haversian systems: 2) n. Veins that run vertically in bone.
“How would that offend Haversian systems?” “Like, the robot ones.” “Oh. I thought you meant veins that run vertically in bone.” “No, that’s the other definition.” “Huh?” “I’d explain it using two example sentences but I can’t think of one for the veins one.” “Yeah, that would be a tough one, wouldn’t it?”
Jejunum: interjection. 1) Used to break the news to a person named Junum, as Junum is rather unlucky.
Person 1: “Jejunum, I don’t know how to tell you this, but that steak you ate was your uncle Harry.”
Junum: “I KNEW IT!”
Jejunum: n. 2) The middle section of the small intestine in most higher vertebrates, including mammals, reptiles, and birds.
Doctor 1: “Jejunum, I don’t know how to tell you this, but that steak you ate is lodged pretty tight in your jejunum.”
Junum: “I KNEW IT!”
Qwuk: n. One who inspires a decreased faith in humanity.
“What a qwuk.”
Libnugget: n. A unit describing a single moment of improvisation.
“The sentence came out just like he had rehearsed at first, “I’m completely in love with”, followed by the panicked libnugget of “bad horror movies from the 50s!”“